FEMME F**K YOU: “World Cup? F**K YEAH!”

^{When the lovely editor of Pink Lobster Dating asked me to write something about the World Cup, I’m not sure this exactly what she had in mind.}

^{Everyone knows that every four years (in England especially), the FIFA World Cup takes over. You can’t change the TV station without seeing 36 adverts which include something to do with football. You can’t walk down the street in the city without seeing a billboard with Joe Hart’s face on it. (Yes, I recently experienced this when the oh-so charming Mr. Hart was staring at me through the window of an Armani store).}

^{Thing is, people don’t expect women to like football. They probably expect that many butch lesbians will love it, but when it comes to femme lesbians it’s a whole different story.}

^{Of course, in many straight men’s eyes, feminine lesbians are just straight women in every area but the bedroom. This is clearly a huge stereotype, at which I would like to say “F**K YOU” too.}

^{Straight girls – it has been pointed out to me by a friend – sometimes claim they like football just to make the dude they like think they are “one of the boys”. To this, I say ‘do whatever you want, ladies, but you’re not being true to yourself.’ (No, I’m not saying that all straight women pretend to like football to please their man, but we can’t rule it out as something that doesn’t happen.)}

^{Anyway, when our editor sent me some ideas about my next post, she included a brief statement about how she hated how football takes over during this time, and – with no disrespect to her at all – probably assumed that I would agree with her.}

^{But guess what: I LOVE FOOTBALL.}

^{Shock. Horror. A feminine lesbian likes football.}

^{“But then you’re clearly just a little bit butch”.}

^{Uh, what? Bitch, I still dip dye my hair up top and wear a cute lacy bra underneath.}

^{Honestly, these are the stereotypes we need to put an end to.}

^{Basically, what you’re saying is that because I’m feminine, I shouldn’t like these so-called ‘masculine’ sports. You’re saying because I enjoy football, I must be that little bit more ‘butch’.}

^{Actually, it’s kinda stupid. In Lehmann’s terms, you’re saying that because I enjoy watching a sport, I’m kind of like a man.}

^{I’m not saying that it’s not okay for femme lesbians to hate the World Cup. It’s all personal choice, and it really doesn’t affect me all that much.}

^{Since when did liking a sporting event make me less feminine? Ask the patriarchy, I guess.}

^{In short: I AM A FEMME LESBIAN AND F**K YOUR FOOTBALL.}